Disclaimer: Don't own them, nor do I own Voyager, I am but a worm. Star Trek Voyager belongs to Paramount/Viacom and no infringement of copyright/trade marks is intended. This story includes same sex relationships between women. If you are offended by this or it is illegal where you live or you are underage then please read no further.
Code: T/7.
Rating: PG13
Archiving: Perfect Misfits is a given, anyone else ask!!
Constructive feedback welcome.
Any feedback or other comments should be sent to bluesylph@hotmail.com
Notes: Silly fluff kinda, inspired by the rat-story somebody wrote on this list (sorry can't remember the name) Also I just came up with the idea and had to write it down.
Short Story
13 Apr 2001
In the Captain's readyroom, Chuckles and Janey have an unknown witness to their conversation.
"Yes Commander?"
"Captain. Uhm I wish to discuss something with you."
"Can't it wait? I'm kind of occupied right now."
"Well I'm concerned for the wellbeing of a member of this crew."
"Hmph. Fine, who are you concerned about?"
"You."
"I'm okay really Chakotay."
"But for how long?"
"Commander? Is there something you know and I don't?"
"You mean you haven't heard the rumors yet?"
"What rumors."
"Well uhmmm."
"Stop shuffling your feet you make my floor dirty like that, and come to the point, if there is one for this conversation."
"Okay well it's about Seven."
"Oh...what about that gorge....erhm Seven."
"Well it basically comes down to the fact that she's..."
"Yes? I'm waiting."
"She's seeing somebody."
"She's WHAT?!?!?!"
"She's seeing somebody."
"I got that the first time. Who? Where? When?"
"B'Elanna Torres, usually in her Engineering Office, and from what we heard from the crew right now."
Thud
"Captain? Uhmm. Kathryn? Uh oh. This is exactly what I ment, why don't people ever listen to me. I just hope she isn't dead. Or maybe...finally Captain."
"I wonder where the nearest airlock is."
"Bzzzzzzzzzzz."
~~~~~~~~~~~
"My God...you kidding me Harry?"
"No I'm serious, and there's so much rumors about them that it's probably true too Tom."
"My ex and the Borg...oh my God."
"Well I'm suprised rumors didn't start sooner seeing how much time they spent in B'Elanna's office."
"Yeah and I thought when B'Elanna said she was coming it was to open the door that one time I found her and Seven in that compromising position."
"Sorry old pal looks like your chances to woo back your girly girl are reduced to zero."
Sigh
"Bzzzzzzzzzzz."
"Hey what's that sound Tom?"
"They are probably using the vibra..."
"Not that, I think it's a fly?"
"Damn I don't want one of those in my quarters, it will probably keep me awake all night, care to give me a hand to dispose of it."
"You mean you can't even swat a fly?"
"Well uhmmm."
"Alright. Hey it's on your forehead Tom, don't move."
"But I...Harry NO!"
SWAT
"Oww!! That was my forehead you....censored"
"Well such a big shiny spot is hard to miss."
"What was that?"
"I said: I'm sorry I missed."
"Okay but where it go?"
~~~~~~~~~~~
"Bzzzzzzzzzz."
"I do not see the point in undressing to help dispose of that sound Lieutenant."
"Well uhm. It helps to distract?"
"Indeed."
"Don't look at me like that."
"I do believe rumors might start."
"Since when do you care about rumors?"
"Since several crewmembers asked me how you were between the sheets"
"Oh? What did you say?"
"We never did it between the sheets."
cough
"Yeah well uhmmm. Well I guess we could move our activities to my quarters maybe since half the ship apparantly knows about this."
"That would be sufficient and satis..."
distant moaning
"Satisfactory?"
"Yes. Oh Yes. Very satisfactory."
~~~~~~~~~~~
Later that day in Ensign Green and Ensign Thomas's quarters...
"So what do you think about those rumors?"
"What rumors?"
"Those rumors."
"Oh yeah mean about Torres and Seven?"
"Yup."
"Uhmm well you know the rumormill aboard Voyager."
"So you think that they spent 3 to 4 hours a day in Lieutenant Torres's quarters working?"
"I never said that."
"Well?"
"Okay I have to admit that it's very suspicious, but I mean come on she lives next door I never heard any weird sounds coming from her quarters."
weird sounds
"Oh yeah? What did you call that."
"Uhm maybe Seven is a very strong believer?"
more weird sounds
"I can understand her calling out for God but now she called out B'Elanna's name."
"Maybe their argueing again? You know how those two are."
"Oh yeah? And that buzzing sound?"
"Just a fly."
"We don't have those aboard."
"BZzzzzzzzz."
"We do now. Look at the wall."
"Damn!!"
Splat
"Not anymore."
"Brrrrrrrrrrzzzzzzzz."
"Shit we really do need to stock up on replicator rations."
"Huh?"
"Soundproofing."
some more weird sounds
"Yup, looks like were going to need it."
The End